What is terrible and doesn't exist? This joke's punchline,

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Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

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how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

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What's black, blue, red, green, white, purple, orange, yellow, etc.? Last I checked, a bunch of colors

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He had no conscience and therefore was not able to backup the very reason that he crossed the road.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ben, you just called me. Aren't we supposed to go jogging. Oh yea, I lost track of time. Is it cold out? Yea it is. You should bring a jacket. Alright, can you get me a water? Yea, no problem. Thankyou.

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why did the doctor go to jail? he was found guilty of the murder and rape of a 6 year old boy.

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A religion is like a penis. They are both nouns.

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What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

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A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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How did the American man get the Mexican man to jump over the wall? He didn't, after several attempts he then got a ladder and climbed over.

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You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

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What does a Jewish woman do to keep her hands soft and her nails long Nothing at all

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Why couldnt Hellen Keller drive? Because vehicles werent invented yet.

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wanna know the biggest joke on antijoke.com? People's spelling.

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So, a Vulcan walks into a bar... and he doesn't say anything, because Vulcan's suppress their emotions.

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Your mother is so ugly that nobody wants to date her because she is hideous.

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What's the difference between Justin Bieber and R. Kelly? One is an arrogant asshole known for pissing on things, the other is R. Kelly.

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I supported my sisters decision to get an abortion. Still would have been cool to be a dad :/

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If a small quiz is a quizicle then what is a small test? A quiz.

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A man walks into his local store, he gets a basket and get a tin of beans, an apple, some kitchen rolls a bag of potatoes and an 8 pack of sausages. He walks to the checkout and the lady working asks him ''Are you single?'' He replies ''Yes, i am actually, how did you know?'' The lady then says ''Because your Ugly as Sin''

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Always do, always will, I have overcome far worse, doctor told my mother when I was born (without a heartbeat) that I was dead, and if they somehow managed to get me breathing again (heart beating etc) I would have suffered so much brain damage that I would not have a concious mind, in other words I would never have been able to learn anything, not to speak nor to type... ...Gotta say I pretty much fucking disagree with the "good" old doctor, and for the record, my heart is as healthy as... Healthy can be I am ambidextrous, but because of this eyedrum mutant thing of mine, I cant tell left from right, because well, to my radar senses both are left and right. Sorry if I am not making much sense here, just bleed a bit out of my nose, had it been from my ears, things could have gotten ugly, but no, its all good.

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Roses are Red, uh..uh..ahhhhh oh shit I just came that curse is true

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your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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