Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

Women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What's green and has wheels? The farmer's tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

2 gays monkeys walk into a bar.........

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What is frowned upon no matter what country you're in? Sex on a plane.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

This night was a stormy one, alot was destroyed, but the spirit of Little Jonny Harrison lived on with a shining light so strong it could blind some. Jonny lived in Ristoville, a village atop a hill. Citizens of Ristoville were frightened for their lives, all but Jonny. He was bullied from a young age of 3 months, by his Uncle Clive, who was a Catholic Priest, full-time. Fear shined in the eyes of the normal residents, whilst, in Jonny's heart, there glowed a glow of pure hope and confidence, Jonny Harrison, was going into the storm. Jonny knew he could amount to something, if he really really tried. He has 6 years behind him, and a long life ahead, and he figured, what's the worst that could happen? He pondered this, and ultimately came to the conclusion that there will be nothing worse out there than Uncle Clive's "Magical Basement of Happiness". Jonny sat his mother down, looked her in the eye and whispered farewell. He wished his father the best wishes possible. Finally, Rosie Harrison, Jonny's sweet old Grandmother, who had been addicted to Crystal Meth for about 25 years now and been through 13 interventions and countless failed suicide attempts, opened her ears to young Jonathon's speech, he said softly in her ear, the words, "Hang in there, Gran. I know you can pull through, I may be only six but I sure as heck know how much i care for you.". The words of love echoed in her fragile little ears as Jonny walked away. He took with him a couple cartons of Ribena and his lucky medal and took his first step outside. He took out a carton of Ribena, strongly crumpled it up, slightly spraying fruit juice on his dungarees, and threw it to the wet grass. He faced the towering lightning cloud and shouted, "Nothing will stop me!". Jonny died shortly after of AIDS. His Uncle Clive was sentence to 5 years in a high security prison for child molestation and consistant child abuse and paedophillia. Rosie Harrison died later that day.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a black man and a black woman having sex? A husband and wife who love each other very much and are trying to have a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +7

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what its name is.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did Sara fell off her swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sara

thumb_up thumb_down +5

One time there was a guy who jumped off a bridge and died

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

thumb_up thumb_down +5

 

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do people call the completely paralyzed man with no eyes? David, his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's the difference between a fat boy and a thin boy? Fizzy drinks!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the buisness man say to the hobo? Nothing, he threw an apple at him and laughed!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What does mickee say to other animals. Mouse

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you get if you cross an angle with an antelope? An anglelope.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What did the suicide bomber say to the other suicide bomber? You're da bomb!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I told my wife she was like a fine wine She asked if it was because she improves with age. I told her yes All was well.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A ship wrecks in the South Pacific ocean. Only one man survives. He swims to a semi-deserted island, and is later eaten by the cannibal inhabitants

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops