Yo mumma so poor that she dosent have any money

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What's hotter than a beautiful girl in a bikini? Among many things, the Sun, the Earth's core, the inside of a volcano...

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Did you hear about the new brand of shovel? Yeah, it's pretty groundbreaking.

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How did the black man get a nice car? He spent 8 years of his life getting a doctorate so he could be hired at a job that will pay for his desired vehicle.

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Customer Service "May I help you?" "Yes."

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There's a elf ,a peice of paper, and a pencil. What happens next? The elf writes on the paper.

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Tom: God! Matt:Where? Tom:Matt i was saying God ! Jesus! Matt: God and Jesus! wow! Tom: why am i talking to you? Matt: Wanna play a game? Tom:bye.

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Why did the little girl fall off her bike? Because she didn't have any arms

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Q: What do the French call a quarter pounder with cheese? A: Le Royale with cheese

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Shape like a book, have papers like a book, have a cover like a book, and could be read like a book. But it's not a book, what is it? A dictionary

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Texter 1: Hey, do you want to hang out? Texter 2: Sorry dude, i lost my phone, i'm trying to find it Texter 1: Ok, text me when you find it Texter 2: OK

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What's brown and smells like shit? An oddly shaped birthmark on a dirty homeless man

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Did you know that all of the seasons are named after coils of metal? Except Winter... And Autum... And Summer...

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I agree Detroit sux. But the bulls suk too ya know

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Why did the blind man itch his knee? He has cancer

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just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

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What made Chuck Norris cry? Stubbing his toe

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What did the bartender say to the upset horse? GET OUT OF MY BAR!!!

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whats black and hangs from my tree a plum

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because it was in the oven because the farmer was cooking it for dinner.

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Say the line below all very fast to get sudden strange sensation... Magic-ish. I like to find threes and peel of their... BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK BARK... ...BARKBARK BARK BARK BARK BARK! Done? Now sit Down, have a little treat Good boy/girl! :Look well at the sun, the jagged Blackness will consume all, Your little star forever but a ever fading memory.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven had a huge ass mole

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A man walked into a doctors and said, “Doctor help! My arms have stopped working” to which the receptionist replied, “I’m not the doctor and you need to make an appointment.”

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what's yellow and hovers? a yellow hovercraft.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops