--- ___________________--- Can you tell what it is? Yes... Then what is it? Its a blanket,duh! ......

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What do you call a black guy that feeds children? A waiter

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Why did the chicken cross the street? Because the light was red and cars had stopped.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

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Why does a clown wear makeup? So you can't identify him to police after he shoves your kids in his tiny car and drives away.

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A buddhist,islamist and a prohibitionist walk into a bar.

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a prison. They're stopped by a gang. Hey, want to play a game? They answer "No thanks, we died in the last joke."

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Why did the little girl go to the hospital?........................Beacuse she fell when trying to steal cookies out of the cookie jar on top of the fridge.

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What's the difference between a smart blonde and bigfoot? There's been sittings of bigfoot

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Knock knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave was beginning to get very scared of his best friend at this time, so he ran away panicking.

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Where did Jonathan go when the bombs hit? Everywhere.

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How many dead babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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How did the chicken cross the road? Assuming the vehicles yielded to the chicken, it looked both directions before crossing then proceded across the street while staying between the crosswalk lines until it had reached the other side of the road.

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why did the kid struggle in school? because hes mentally retarted

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What's worse than a baby nailed to a tree? Ten babies nailed to a tree. What's worse than ten babies nailed to a tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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Q: What would happen if you threw a red brick into the black sea? A: It would get wet.

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I saw a woman get burned alive on the news... That woman was my mom.

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Why doesn't little jimmy ride his favourite bike to school any more? He was playing on the platform at at the railway station, tripped and fell across the track, at which point a seven carriage train came through at over 150 mph and cut through his upper thighs crushing everything in his legs and causing them to fall off.

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roses are red violets are blue sunflowers are yellow I bet you were expecting something romantic but this is just gardening facts

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There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a well respected member of the community.

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The shopkeeper said to a customer, "It's raining cats and dogs!" The customer said, "Okay, I'll take eight of them."

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Barack Obama.

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Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops