Why did the murder walk up to the lady in the car? It was his mom.

Why did the little girl cry? Because she had just witnessed the slaughter of her entire family and friends in front of her eye, leaving her not only peerless and alone, but also with the mental scars which come with witnessing such a harrowing ordeal.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. At least that's what I've heard, I'm blind.

What did the black guy who was lost in Syria say? "Where am I?"

A blonde dies Lololol

Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? No, but considering there has not been a single man to walk on the moon since 1972, it'd be difficult to generate any kind of revenue on this natural satellite.

Did you know that onions is the only food that makes you cry? Oh? Really? Positive. what if I threw a coconut at you're face. ...

Q: what do you call a boy with no arms and an eye patch? A: names

Q:How do you kill a blonde? A:The same way you kill everyone else.

Exercise Ex - Er - Cise Ex - Ar - Size.. Eggs Are Sides For bacon.. BACON

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

what did the cat say to the potato? meow

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

Doctor Doctor i've got wind can you give me something? Thats not wind the doctor replies thats a rare form of stomach cancer.

Your mama is so stupid she has an IQ lower than an average person.

Fill in the blank: A ______ is a man's best friend. Jake: Is it dog? Host: YES! Now for the 1 million dollars! Finish the sentence: I just saved a lot of money by Jake: Switching to Geico? Host: Sorry, that's incorrect. The correct answer is "I just saved a lot of money by not spending it on useless junk and by budgeting my account towards investing in the future." Oh well, nice try.

What do you call a black man reading a book? An avid reader that happens to be black

A boy wakes up in the morning and says i"'m feeling kind of fishy today," the boy's dad walks in and relpies "that's because you are a fish."

I mustache you a question. But I'll shave it for later.

Why did the women cross the road? I dont know.. why? no clue.. why was she out of the kitchen

Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

how many people does it take to take over the world aperently just 1 me

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...