What did Helen Keller do at a concert? Sit.

why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

What do you call a taxi driver eating on a gourmet restaurant? A taxi driver.

A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

Why did the man with no arms fall of his bike? Someone threw a washing machine at him

What's just not right? Left

Life gave me onions. Onionaide Sucks

Who is Jonathan Ezell He is Jonathan Ezell

What fruit is used to make apple juice? Apples

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

Your mom is so fat That the salesman advised her not to buy the tight dress

Peg leg Pete, yay, I know stuff too, I watched that one all the time when I was a girl.

Why did the depressed man commit suicide? Its typical of a depressed person.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: In order to avoid being mauled by a coyote.

Knock knock, Who's th- IMA FIRIN' MA LAZOR

a guy walks into a bar. he buys several drinks, ends up drunk, and crashes into a coffee shop with a goat in the backseat.

whats brown and fluffy? brown fluff

What do you call a black man with a speech impediment? By his name.

A. Big feet, you know what that means B. He has to order his shoes on line because they don't carry his size in stores.

Roses are red, Violets are microwaves, I have amnesia, Roses are red.

What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

Whats gay and smells like paint? A gay man covered in paint.

Q: How do you confuse more than 80% of the population? A: Mushrooms.

What happens when two elephants go out in the rain? They get wet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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