Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because he saw a Vladimir Putin.

A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

how do you get a black guy out of a tree? fried chicken.

what is big, white, and can't climb a tree? a fridge

How do you kill a polar bear? Global Warming.

Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

Whats green and fuzy and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

a man walks into a desert Obama is there to greet him and they have a nice chicken dinner

How do you unload a truck full of dead babies? With a pitch fork.

Q: Wgat do you call a black man's dead bodie? A: A corpse.

I see London, I see France. Wow! This high-speed train that travels across Europe is amazing!

Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

What did the one battery say to the other? Nothing. Batteries can't talk.

What was going through the minds of the Sandy Hook victims? Bullets.

why did victor sell half of club getaway because he wants a partner why did david buy the half because victors dying

whats yellow after cani...nathan

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Go home and hang yourself.

How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to change a lightbulb? It varies. Alzheimer's is a very slow progressing disease, and many people suffering from it are capable of a wide variety of a number of everyday activities.

why did jimmy fall of of the tractor? Because he is a potato

Girl: I wanna get yo pants. Boy: but im wearing shorts.

You want to know something bad? A bag of dead babies. You wanna know something worse? One was still alive. You wanna know something even worse? He ate his way out. You wanna know something even worse? He went back for seconds.

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Why was the 2-year-old girl found dead in the swamp? Her mom was Casey Anthony.

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's blind and deaf, any situation with her in the drivers seat of a car would have serious implications.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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