What do you get when you put a blue bucket in the red sea? it gets wet

'Doctor, doctor, I think I'm a pair of curtains' Doctor prescribes antipsychotics.

Its a sunny day. There's a tree and a bird. What did they say to each other? --------------------------------------------------- Nothing they can't talk.

A blind man asked me out last night. I told him I was seeing someone...

A man walks into a bar... And orders a glass of beer to cool himself off after a long day at the quarry.

Roses are red, Bacon is brown, this poem makes no sence, BACON!!

Why do midgets laugh when they run? Because the grass tickles there balls

If a quiz is also referred to as a quizzicle, then what is a test also referred to as? A test, really. There are no synonyms for 'test' which would result in a humorous punchline; 'exam,' 'essay' and 'evaluation' are the closest possible answers and none of them provide humor at all.

Q: What did Batman say when Robin was in the Batmobile? A: Robin, get out of the Batmobile.

What's worse than eating poop for your whole life? Nothing really, you've got serious problems if you have another option...

What did one cat say to the other cat? Nothing.

The horse walks into the bar and the bartender says, "why the long face?" the horse looks at him and says, "my wife just died."

in 2001 a man was working happily in his office cubicle and got an email from his boss saying that he had great news for him. filled with excitment he knew he was getting A big promotion and could finally afford that new toy his kid has always wanted. Feeling great the man walks up to the office window to enjoy the view he notices a very large commercial airliner flying straight towards his office.

Q: How did the dead baby get to the other side of the road? A: I threw it over there.

What's big, red and delicious? A prune. I lied about it being big, red and delicious.

*puts thumbs up on own anti-joke. Nobody needs to know....

what did the astronaut say to the rocket scientist? hi

How else can an Asian wear a contact lens? Too bad for them. They can;t sucks for them. Asians with small eyes EXCEPT FOR INDIANS look ugly

What's green, has six legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.

A jewish man walks into a bar and then gets hit in the testicles. he now has testicular cancer.

Why did the black man buy a watermelon..... so he can eat it.

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

A black person walked up to another black person, and tells him a pun the other black person laughs and walks away

How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? It depends on their painting skills.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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