frogs are green and grass is greener i just blew up ur mom and ur the cleaner now get to work SLAVE

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: How do you make a five year cry twice? A: There are many ways, as children are generally not that adept at controlling their emotions. Loud noises, threats of violence, images of scary monsters... those tend to work. Be sure to let them stop crying before making them cry again, otherwise you will have only made them cry once.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

It's The Only Crayon The illustrator had?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: Why does Bill Gates give so much money to charity? A: Because he wants to improve the lives of his fellow human beings, and also excessive wealth would be detrimental to his children.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why did the black person jump the fences? because he was in a relay race.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

If a man is alone in the woods and there is no one there to tell he's wrong is he right? If a tree falls on a women.... Before we tell the rest why was there a tree I the kitchen?

thumb_up thumb_down -18

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just two, but I'd like to know how they got in there.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What's black and red and on the ground? A dead black guy.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

If you give a mouse a cookie, he will probably eat it then have a heart attack due to the high level of sugar in the cookie

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Why was the asian a bad driver? Because while he was driving a leprechaun was punching him in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What was the weather like at the rap concert?there was a lil wayne.I DID A FUNNY! !!

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you do when you say shut up to someone and they say make me? Rip out their vocal cords.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A blind man walks into a bar. But he wasn't hurt badly and continued on his way.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

your mumma so fat when she stepped on the scales it said her phone number

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Harry Potter: Hey voldemort, you wanna go get our noses pierced?? Voldemort: I killed your parents.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

I see London. I see France. Show me your boobs.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

A man in a car turned left at the end of his road. Then he proceeded .1 miles and turned left again, as his GPS instructed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q:what's faster than a black man with you t.v A:his brother with your laptop

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

thumb_up thumb_down -18

oh, you have a baby on board? I'll just drive into the the car next to you...

thumb_up thumb_down -18

what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: You were adopted.

thumb_up thumb_down -18

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops