Q. What did the pedophile get when he went to jail? A. Exactly what he wanted.

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what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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( . Y . )

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Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

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I would tell you a joke but I'm not funny

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Why are Asians such bad drivers? They're not: it is a racist stereotype that is propagated by people who are so insecure that they must put others down to feel good about themselves.

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What has red dots and is yellow all over A poisonous frog

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Its linked with the process of extracting uranium isotopes, but lets change the subject, with that said, I hope you can help me with some management advice such as the one you gave me, I will of course pay you.

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A man walks into a bar and orders 12 shots. "8?" Asks the bartender, to verify he had heard correctly. He feels unsure of giving the man 12 shots but does so anyways due to his financial situation and he hopes for a generous tip. Afterwards, the man kills 9 people in a car crash due to his level of intoxication and the bartender seeps into depression due to his feeling of guilt.

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Well no, thats not true, sorry, I mean I GET THAT ALL THE FUCKING TIME!

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is dead.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding two worms in your apple.

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you know what is so funny hillary clinton!!!!!!

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I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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What goes in dry and comes out wet and sticky? Bubble Gum

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whats long, black, and smells like shit? a big turd

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what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

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Why did the chicken cross the road? They had a sale on dresses on the other side.

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A man walks into a bar, he realizes he has no money and leaves

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Doctor, Doctor I think your gay. thats because i am

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Ask me if I'm Abraham Lincoln. Are you Abraham Lincoln? No.

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What is a slave fighting in a pit of Rome? Just a slave. Who cares?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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