How many babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends on how hard you throw them.

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Math teacher: I have 5 bottles in one hand, and 6 in the other. What do I have? Student: A drinking problem. _._._

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whats the capital of congo famine

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How are jello and frankenstein alike? Both green, both alive, and bill cosby didn't make me want either.

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What's worse than bombs? Nukes

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How do you make a clown cry? Kill his family

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What did the man with no arms say to the jewish man? I have no arms.

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Why couldn't 7 multiply itself by 18? Because there were two people having sex in between them.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But I have cancer.

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Those who can't teach... Aren't teachers.

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A Horse walks into a Bar. The barman says "Why the long face?" The Horse had cancer.

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How do you make a baby cry Throw a brick at its face

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why did the mexican cross the road? to get to the lawn mowing shop becuase his wife has breast cancer, and he cant pay the bills sitting on his butt and getting a check from the government every month

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blargen fa-diddle nachen!

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What's worse than tripping over a tree root? The destruction of the ancient city of Pompeii in A.D. 79. Though tripping over a tree root may hurt and result in the victim bleeding profusely, we live in the 21st century and at any time can call a doctor using a cellular device called a phone. In A.D. 79, no technology in this category existed. People were overpowered by the rage of a mountain that they believed was a sign of the wrath of the heavens. People had to flee the city and a majority of them we killed by either inhaling to much smoke or other causes. This continued for over 18 hours. Therefore, the destruction of Pompeii is far worse than tripping over a tree root.

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Try typing in any three letters in Google images and you will always see something inappropriate. Posted by: BerserkSpoon

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What do a carrot and a kangaroo have in common? Nothing...

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Why wasn't the tractor moving? Because the farmer was killed in a drive-by shooting.

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Jellybeans

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Why did the fish cross the road? Because the chicken was carrying an aquarium.

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What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

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Why did the drunk walk into the bar? Because he has a serious drinking problem.

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What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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Knock, Knock. Lol jk, we all know knock knock jokes fricken suck.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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