A man walks into a grab and go restaurant and asks the man if he can stay, the man replies "yes."

Why doesn't Michael Jackson play with my brother anymore? Because he's dead.

So, I walked into my friends house and MAH DEDDEHS DECK was outside bruh

Two gay men are seen walking down a street in Texas. Actually now that I think about it homosexuality is pretty much outlawed in Texas. Two gay men are thrown into a Texan Jail where they spend the rest of their lives, cold hungry and alone.

A plane crashes near an uncharted island with a low supply of fresh water and hardly any animals, except for a few deadly ones. How do the survivors live until rescuers show up? -There were no survivors from the plane crash

What's the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A bench is an inanimate object and a Mexican is a human being.

A baby seal walks into a club.

what did the dead guy say to the boy? nothing he is dead.

How do you get a one armed polock out of a tree? You assess the situation and get a ladder the proper size to reach him, making sure the ladder is stable.

Knock Knock. Who's There? Timmy. YOU DON'T KNOW ME!!!!!

One time at band camp, We practice playing our instruments and had fun.

Why did the black man get stuck to the ceiling? Because he was spiderman.

How many Alzheimer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side.

Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

IMMA FIND YO ASS DO!!!!!

Did you here about the man who dropped a glass? It broke.

What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheelchair

Mom: Are you going to jump of a cliff just cause your friends are? Kid: You got married to dad cause you were the last lonely whore left of all your friends. And you wanna talk to me about peer pressure. Mom: Go jump.

Why did the cop pull over the car full of black people? Because, they were going 65 in a 35 mile per hour speed limit zone, Which is against the law.

What's worse than a dead baby in a trash can A hundred dead babies in a trash can Whats worse than a hundred dead babies in a trash can A live one at the bottom Whats worse than that It eats it way out Whats worse than that It brings friends

What is long, hard and comes out of a gay persons bum? poo

Whats worse than tripping? Getting shot

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

It's yellow and when you press the button, it becomes red... A baby chicken in a blender

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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