What the difference between an apple and a pear One of them is red

What's red and has zippers? Nothing, because watermelons can't physically drive without the help of a sheeps spinal cords ... DUH

Knock knock. Who's there? Not Madeleine mecanne.

A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

What's worse than a tree getting cut down? This joke.

A Black guy and a Mexican are in a car. Who is driving? The black guy. Its his car.

What's worst than a holocaust 2 holocaust's

Why couldn't Johnny drive? Because he had no arms or legs. Why didn't he have any arms or legs? Because Johnny was a potato.

A Great White Shark eats a baby seal's mother. Great White Sharks don't feel remorse.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

a chicken walks into a cafe, where it is swiftly caught, killed, plucked ,and served with stuffing and all for £5.99

Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun? Because leprechauns don't exist.

Roses are blue Violets are red Is that really What I just said?

why did the woman get electricuted? because there was an electric fence around the kitchen.

How do you get a horse to stop humping your leg? Pick it up and suck its dick.

What's black and white and read all over? Michael Jackson. I spelled "red" wrong.

What did the rake say to the shovel? Nothing, they're both inanimate objects.

Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? It didn't. She did not own a dog.

What's sad about a mexican man dying in a car crash? He had a family that loved and cared for him.

wanna hear a joke? me niether.

Why did the woman stop jogging? She got mauled by a bear.

Why do girls enjoy listening to Justin Biebers music? Because he sings moderately well and appeals to a younger audience.

What do you say to a blind man in a sunglasses store? Nothing. Why do you feel the need to bother strangers while you needlessly shop at your local merchandise outlet?

Roses are red, Violets are blue, So what is the colour violet for?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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