Why didn't the Hispanic die in the bus explosion? Because he was at home playing with his children when it happened.

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What's brown and smells like shit? Shit.

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Q : How many babies do you need to paint a wall A : It depends on how hard you throw

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Why did the the chicken cross the road? So he wouldn't be late for his annual check up at the clinic across the street.

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How many pancakes does it take to make a dog house? None because alligators don't fly.

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A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette have a contest to see who can get the most likes on their profile pictures. They are all attention-whores.

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Why do people poke people on facebook? Because they have no friends and will die alone

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John: Knock knock Jack: Who's there? John: Whale Jack: I don't know a Whale, go away. John violently rips off Jack's cock in becaus he's sick of his shit.

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What is a mean thing to say to Stephen Hawking? Please take a seat.

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Your Black, Im Black, We're all Black

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What happens when your scared half to death...twice!!? Nothing, being scared half to death is an expression, you should not be fearing for your life.

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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How many fingers do u have? 11 Start with left pinky count 10,9,8,7,6 then 6+5=11

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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What did one banana say to the other banana? Answer: It didnt say anything because bananas are inanimate objects, so it isn't humanly possible for a banana to speak.

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Jesus can walko water Humans are 70% water I can walk on humans Therefore i am 70% Jesus

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What's the difference between a chair and an identical chair? Nothing.

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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Writing is hard Poems are strong I am muslim And this is a bomb.

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What do you call an Asian man without any clothes on? -naked

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What the difference between a car and a dead child I dont have a car in the basement

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Why did the black man have a Lamborghini in his garage? Because he got good grades in school, was accepted into a nice college, and earned a medical degree, which he used to get himself a well-paying job in the medical field.

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Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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