What happens when a black guy jumps you? Well its no diffrent to when anyone else jumps you!

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What do you call a black man running for congress? A: Congressional Candidate

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock knock Who's there? Hector Hector who? ....I forgot the rest of the joke but your mom is a whore.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How did the Mexican get into the U.S.A.? He came in legally, and got his green card. He then continued his life as a business man and won the lottery four years later for 5 million dollars. He then bought a cool television, he also had children and put the money in their college funds later.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the boy fall of his bike? He's learning to ride and understandably lost his balance.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A farmer hears a knock at the door on a rainy night. He opens the door and welcomes an attractive young man in. The farmer gets his budding teenage daughter to fetch the man a towel. He dries himself off, thanks them both, and goes to bed. He's gone before anyone else wakes up and leaves a fifty on the table.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q. What did the chinease man say when he got flattened by a plane? A. Nothing, he died instantly.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Two men walk into a bar.........ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many blondes does it take to skrew in a lightbulb? Usually just one.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

how did the doctors try to cure stephen hawking? turn him off then back on again

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Its December 21, 2012. You are still alive.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call a Mexican that doesn't have a lawn mower? An honest working induvidual that just so happens to live in the city and does not own a lawn mower

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Harry Chappell raped someone

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A Hispanic man, an African woman, and a Caucasian man walk into a bar. No one wins this round of "Racial Equality Appreciation Day's" game of limbo.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you call two grown Mexican men playing tennis? Two adults showcasing their talent in a friendly game of tennis.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

I was walking down the street then my hands were itchy so I stuck em in my pockets Jk, I'm a donkey. We don't have hands

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What do you get when you stab a baby? A dead baby.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How many kids does it take to fix a light bulb 5 1 to fix the light bulb and the others to get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Wats rong with yo leg.....

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Knock Knock Who's there? The police. The police who? Your family have been involved in a fatal accident and we need you to come and identify the bodies.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

A little blind girl goes up to her mum and says, "Mummy, mummy, when will I be able to see?" Her mum replies "I'll tell you what, I'll take you to the chemist and get you some special cream for your eyes and you will be able to see in the morning." So off they went to the chemist, got the cream, and went home, all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited at the prospect of being able to see again. Once they got home, the mother put the cream on the little girls eyes, wrapped a bandage around her head, and took her to bed. The following morning the little girl stumbled into her mums bedroom and excitedly shouted "Quick mummy, take off the bandage so that i will be able to see again." So the mother slowly took of all the bandages, taking her time, and all the while the little girl was getting more and more excited. Once they were off the little girl said "But mummy, I still can't see." To which the mother replied, "April fool!"

thumb_up thumb_down +15

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did silly Miss Sally put her baby in the dishwasher? Because she was suffering from advanced stages of Schizophrenia. She thought that her baby was a dish. Her mother, Carol watched in horror as her granddaughter was placed inside. A tear dribbled from her eye. Things had been bad, but because Sally was her daughter, she had been tolerant. Carol sobbed as the baby screamed in terror, unable to escape. Finally, Carol, tears in her eyes, called Child Protective Services on her own daughter, something she didn't want to do. When CPS representatives finally came, they were horrified at the sight of a screaming baby covered in suds with burnt skin that had been scorched by hot jets. Sally's baby, Alex was taken from her and put into foster care.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops