What do you call a mexican with a broom in his hand? a man who likes to keep his office at his own company clean

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What do you call an art history major with a job? A gainfully employed member of society, who assuredly benefited from his access to higher education (and quite possibly from acquaintances or family members within the company that employs him, though it is often considered impolite to mention this latter fact, as it may be construed to denigrate the aforementioned individual or his chosen field of study).

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Yo mamma is so fat She has to wear big pants and is easily fatigued.

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What starts with F and ends with Uck? F U C K

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what do you call a redneck virgin? a seven year old that can run faster than her brothers.

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how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

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Q. What do you call a deceased rodent A. Deadmau5

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Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

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Why couldnt the dog bark? The dog didnt exist.

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Why are bowling balls racist? They are not because bowling balls are incapable of having feeling therfore they cannot have racial thoughts or actions.

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Do you like fishsticks No

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why was the boy sad because he had a cat stapled to his face

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why can't Michael Jackson bake a pie???? Because he's dead

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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roses are red, violets are blue, ive no money for presents, happy christmas everybody

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If I had a penny for every time I said the word "the" I would have AIDS

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yo mama is so ugly she walked by a mirror and looked at her reflection cuz thats what mirrors do

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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Who is worse then Charlie Sheen? Hitler.

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Why did the murder walk up to the lady in the car? It was his mom.

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Why was the little kid sad at a funeral. He was actually happy and he was at six flags

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There was a little boy and a little girl in a bathtub having a bath. Suddenly the little girl looked down at the boy. "Can I touch it?" "No way -- you already broke yours off!"

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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