When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

What's worse than the holocaust? An open-minded black man.

Q:Why did the boy have no friends A: because Ants are not considered friends

Son : daddy ,I got punished in school today. Dad :why? Son: My teacher pointed the scale towards me saying -"At the end of this scale there is an idiot"..... I just asked "WHICH END ?.

What did the 20-year old woman say too the old man? HI GRANDPA!

person one: ask me if im a carrot person two: are you a carrot? person one: nope (the walks away)

Knock Knock. Who's there? Hook. Hook who? Who are you Hooking Your Horns to?

What's worst than your computer breaking? Your face

Allmighty Genie vs Common douche Genie: I the allmighty Genie am at your command, I can grant you any three WISHES Common douche: Okay! I want to sit on my own lap Genie: Uh...Well...You uh sure you want that? I Uh... Wait a moment please... Wimp wins Genieous victory.

Why did the white kid tear up while watching a segment on slavery? He got something in his eye.

roses are red , thankyou for stating that , i can now continue with gardening as it is my profession.

Once i was walking down the street when i saw a homeless man As i leant to give him money he jumped up and stabbed me. Now i don't approach drunk strangers with hangovers

i like men but im not gay

A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

Is it a bird, is it a plane?! No it's.... It's a bird.

There once was a man from Duluth who's never did rhyme. They were often too short.

Girl you must be Jamaican...because you're black and annoying.

An Englishman, A Scotsman, a Welshman, an Australian, An American, A German, A Swede, A Kiwi, An Austrian, A Belgian, A Frenchman, A Chinese Guy, An Indian, A Turk, A Czech, A Canadaian, A Russian, A serbian, A Portuguese, A brazilian, An Argentine and a South African go in to a bar. The Security stops them and says "I'm sorry i can't let you in without a thai"

three black teenagers went to the cinema to watch twilight

Roses are red My balls are blue Get off Unless You want too

Who is the dumbest person on the entire internet? Shortpoet-GTD

Whats worse than standing on lego? Rebecca black. whats worse than Rebecca Black? Justin Bieber. Whats worse than justin Bieber? Standing on a baby that isnt yours.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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