One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

A giraffe walks into a bar.... just kidding, a giraffe wouldnt fit in a bar.

One time at band camp, We practice playing our instruments and had fun.

just imagine like a whole dad no imagine like 1000 dads an army of dads ready to conquer

How many apple does it take to turn a fridge into a water buffalo? Yellow tactics because of the Minty fragrance

Why did the little girl cry? Because she saw her future.

Two crabs are standing on a wall. One of them falls down. The second one's name is Georges.

What do you call a jew in an oven? A safety hazard

Q.) How do you make a whore blush? A.) Tell her she has pretty eyes.

why did the chicken cross the road ask jake darby

what do ninjas and gay people have in common... if you eat them they will no longer be alive

How can you tell two twin sisters apart? Look at one twin, then look at the other, and acknowledge that they are two different people.

What's brown and adhesive? A stick

So a baby seal walks into a club

What's worse than failing your midterms? Child abuse.

A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

A horse walks into a bar gets shot then carried away in a helicopter

have you ever had african food? neither have they

A Finn, a Swede and A Norwegian went to an island. The Norwegian shot them all.

How come grilled cheese?

A black guy and a white guy jump out of a tree, who hits the ground first? They both hit at the same time while sustaining minor injuries.

Bill goes and buys 45 watermelons, what does he have? 45 watermelons.

What's worse than getting AIDS from your boyfriend? Getting AIDS from your brother.

Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: 2 in the front, 3 in the back and 95 in the ash tray.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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