What did the man do when the woman broke up with him? He changed his facebook status to single.

What did the Hungarian say before he went to bed? "I'm going to bed," but he said it in Hungarian.

Roses are gray Violets are gray Pansies are gray Daffodils are gray I am a dog :)

A young black man walks into a KFC. He takes a quick stop in the bathroom and continues on the road to his ivy league college.

What happened when the woman sent back the pair of shoes she bought on eBay? She obtained a refund from the seller under eBay's return policy.

whats worse than someone blowing out all your birthday candles? a piano dropping on your head.

What did the wall say to the other wall? Nothing. Walls don't talk.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a rapist.

i got 99 problems.... and aids is one

Knock Knock Who's There Seventeen Thirty Eight I'm like hey what's up hello Seen yo pretty ass soon as you came in that door I just wanna chill, got a sack for us to roll Married to the money, introduced her to my stove Showed her how to whip it, now she remixin' for low She my trap queen, let her hit the bando We be countin' up, watch how far them bands go We just set a goal, talkin' matchin' Lambos Got 56 a gram, prob' a 100 grams though Man, I swear I love her how she work the damn pole Hit the strip club, we be letting bands go Everybody hating, we just call them fans though In love with the money, I ain't never letting go And I get high with my baby (baby) I just left the mall, I'm getting fly with my baby, yeah

Q: Why couldn't Billy breathe? A: Because when the truck ran over him his lungs were crushed.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

There once was a woman from Ealing, Who had a peculiar feeling She went to the doctors and was consequently diagnosed with Chlamydia

A little girl was curious about where people come from so she asked a very controversial question. Girl goes up to her mother and ask "Mommy, where do babies come from?" Mother replies "Ask daddy." Girl says "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Father replies "Ask the dog." Girl then goes up to her dog and says "Doggy, where do babies come from?" The dog doesn't reply because it's a dog.

Q: What's worse than both of your parents dying in a terrible car accident? A: Sitting in the back seat with your grandparents.

A Jew walks into an expensive Hotel and orders 500 dollars worth of wine.

So a white president,a mexican president, and a black president,are on a plane and its going down. The white president wishes he was a dove, and he flies away to safety. Then the mexican president wishes he was an eagle and he flies away to safety. Then the black president falls out the plane and says o s**t and turns into poop.

* How many roads must a man walk down before you call him a man? * He just need to go to the Register Office and change his name to "a man"

What is green and has wheels? A blue car.

Kevin stinks signed Taggart. Is this how you do it!!!

hard cheese

-What do you say to a woman with Two Black eyes?. -Are you really that dumb to leave the kitchen twice -Elder High School

Why is Macaroni Boy so Cool Because He's not

What is holocaust victim's favorite food? Hamburgers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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