How did Richard the lion heart get his name? From his parents.

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What is yellow and writes? -A Ball Point Banana!

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Anti Jokes = Drained

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when i jump on a trampoline.

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Did you hear about the young couple that confused K-Y jelly with window caulking? All their windows fell out.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He didnt. Why do we have to live in a world where people have to be so concered about why a stupid chicken decides to cross a road. Shouldnt we all be more focused on ways to get a better economy, or maybe end world hunger?

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What's worse than a gay joke? Their emotional repercussions, leading to a lack of self-esteem, which eventually drives the homosexual to commit suicide, leaving behind a now destroyed family.

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Why did the plane crash Because the pilot was hit in the face with an axe

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What is the name of the car? What

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two muffins were in an oven, one muffin said to the other, " ohmygod! its so hot in here!" the other muffin said,"AHHHHHH!!!! its a talking muffin!!"

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Roses are red Violets are blue We cant have sex I have ED

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: He was being chased by a coyote that hadn't eaten in several days.

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Why did the math student refuse to do his geometry homework? Straight lines do not exist, so there is no real world application to any geometric shape.

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anal seepage

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Why the USA support the 'Kony 2012'? For Oil

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What can a pizza do that a Jew can't? Pizzas can't do anything, so the answers are infinite.

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Why did the boy Drop his Ice Cream? Because he was hit by a bus.

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what do you call a jew hanging from a tree? dead

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What do you get if you have a bundle of children's clothing, some moisturising cream, a gas mask, a lollipop, more candy and a bag? A disguise.

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Why did the Mexican mow his neighbors lawn? Because the Mexican was 12 years old and his neighbor was paying him $20 to mow the lawn.

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What did the man with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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whts worse than finding a worm in your apple? butt sex with the devil

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Knock knock? Who's there? John. John who? John who is hospitalized in critical condition because he was struck by a ladder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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