Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

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why was six afraid of seven? because seven raped six's mom.

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Four brothers joined the army and were deployed to Iraq. Two of them committed suicide.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse, incapable of understanding the human languages, promptly shits on the floor and leaves...

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Why does Rupert the Bear wear chequered trousers? Because that's how the creator originally drew him.

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Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

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Fool me once, shame on you Fool me twice, shame on me Fool me 3 times, oh now you're just being a jerk

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Your mama's so fat, she cries daily and regularly questions her purpose in life.

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An irish man stumbles out of a bar.

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A man invented a time machine that didn't work. Because he wasn't a scientist, he was an ice cream man.

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When life gives you lemons, you throw them at your friends. If they throw them back, duck

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What's black and white and red all over? The color spectrum. Along with other colors.

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How do you make a sandwich out of clay? Shape it like a sandwich

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What is the name of Steven Hawkins condom.... Anti virus

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What's brown and sticky? Most forms of excrement.

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I want to tie a baby to the back of a truck then reverse into a wall.

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Nothing exceedingly odd happened at a bar

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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Five people all from different backgrounds get in a car and nobody get's raped.

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What's your guys names?

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How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw 'em.

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Why do black people drink cool-aid? Because it tastes good.

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That moment when the best part of your life is when you get 50 friends on Facebook....

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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