What do you call a Black Man in the ocean? A scuba diver

How do you minimize the likelihood of theft? Take the derivative.

"I am proud to be black and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist. "I am proud to be white and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Racist and offensive to black people "I am proud to be asian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Not racist "I am proud to be Ethiopian and I wouldn't want to be any other race." - Said nobody, ever

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Cancer

why did the boy have no friends? cause he was smelly

Why was the boy's face red? He put his cat in a blender.

What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

What happened to the deaf, dumb, and blind kid? I don't know. Niether does he.

There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

What did Stephen Hawking say to a prostitute? Push me, and then just touch me, Till I can get my, Satisfaction.

Why was the muslim surprised? A tyrannosaurus rex bit off his legs.

Adolf the Red-Nosed Hitler

Your Mum Is So Dumb, It Took Her 2 Hours To Watch 60 Minutes.

Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

What happened to the orphan? Who cares?

why was justin sad? his family was murdered

Neither have I

Did you hear about the new German oven? Seats 40.

Why was Sally angry? Because somebody burned all her clothes

the man was talking to a phone no answered cause he talking to a brick wall

What do you call a man who is walking into walls and poles? A blind man who really needs your help.

So an irishmen, jewish, and asain walk into the bar...and the bartender said get out..

Why did Susy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? NOT SUSY!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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