epic win?

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What does have stripes, give milk and can fly? A zebra, a cow and an eagle.

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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A man approaches an attractive young woman at a party. He asks her if a rag smells like chloroform and proceeds to hold the rag up to her face. She passes out, the man takes her into a nearby bedroom and rapes her. He casually leaves the party. He will most likely continue this vile act for years to come.

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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Why did the student get the math question wrong? -Because hes dead

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Justin Beiber

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roses are blue violets red im color blind vatalk is gay

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He is outside, running for it, Erron, seriously who is We? I thought you where an author.

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What's black and white and red all over? Michael Jackson after being hit by a train.

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Your mamma's so dumb, we are seriously worried she might hurt herself.

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Four turtles once fell into nuclear waste. They remained unnoticed and later died from exposure to radiation.

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How many alzheimers patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? To get to the other side

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Why did the Mexican cut his neighbor's lawn? His neighbor cut his lawn the previous week.

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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Which is the rarest animal in the North pole? The Polaroid.

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What are 3 skills black people have that they use for basketball? Great hand eye co-ordination, communication and encouragement.

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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What is 1 inch long and eats everyone in it's way .... my pet fish

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What did the doctor say to the pregnant mother? Your babies dead

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I was going to write a joke about Alzheimers ... but I completely forgot it.

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Why did the man and woman have sex? To have a good time, but the man's condom failed and they ended up with a deformed baby because they were brother and sister. Those are your parents. Enjoy

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What has hands but cannot feel? A sociopath; due to his or her mental health condition they are incapable of feeling true emotion.

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What's similar between a yellow bicycle and blue potatoes? They both have weight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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