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What do you call a man who has lost both his legs, one arm, and half his eye? Larry

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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What did the grape say when it got stepped on? Nothing really, it just let out a little whine.

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A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

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Whats Stupider than john? Nothing.. he's certifiably retarded

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Why was the boy put on his socks? So he wouldn't get blisters.

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KARL KARASHIAN - FACEBOOK

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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OMG did you hear about the man who sky-dived from mars?!!!! No…. Me neither

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Why was the kid late for his dentist appointment? He was abducted and he's been missing for thirteen days

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Who gets more action than my best friend Reese? My raped cousin....

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Whats worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. Whats worse then two bee stings? The holocaust. Whats worse then the holocaust? Three bee stings.

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There were two blondes at an ATM. One was entering her PIN number and the other one says, "Haha! I know your password! It's ****!" The other one replies, "Haha! No, it's 1358."

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How do you make a baby cry ? Throw a brick at his face

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A blonde went to buy a Pizza and after ordering, the assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve. "Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"

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tim has no humor

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Why did Bob fall off the swim? He had no arms or legs.

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What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

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Q: What causes earthquakes? A: Your mother walking.

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Why did the man die? because he hit his head and drowned

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Jimmy tells his mom he wants to be a Firefighter when he grows up to which the mother replies, "You can't Jimmy, you have leukemia."

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A black man walks into a KFC. He buys a bucket of chicken, then distributes it to several homeless men he supports off of his meager income because he knows their situations are much worse than his.

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Q: What's wrong with being gay A: Nothing is wrong with anybody because we're all human

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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