Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

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Q: Why did Robin Williams kill himself? A: Because he was jealous of all the attention that Phillip Seymour Hoffman was getting.

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What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

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If you were a cactus, why?

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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Q. Why did Sally fall off the swing? A. She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Why was the bus driver sad? The kid with the icecream had c4 strapped to his chest.

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What do you call a car that doesn't work? Broken.

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Sarah Jessica Parker walks into a bar. Several occupants leave as they realise the danger of the large animal.

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what happens when y tell ur deff brother uve been sleeping with his wife..nothing

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Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

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This time I saw it, so that is covert hypnosis, I mean normally people are aware that they are under a trance, but like now it was like huh? Until the last point there. You used caps in order to make it seem as if you where shouting, the mind reacts that way and bam! The hypnotic state leaves... ...I was kinda beginning to enjoy that... Nice, now I totally do not want to eat this thing, strawberry my butt.

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What would Marylin Monroe be doing right now if she was alive? Clawing her way out of her coffin.

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A priest, a minister and a rabbit were seated next to each other on an airplane. They all had to pay for lunch.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a bag of dead babies? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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The sentence at the bottom is true. The sentence at the top is false.

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Why couldn't Suzie ride the swings? She got hit by a refrigerator.

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Hello! I am Harry Potter, and i will be teaching you pottery today! Yes, call me Mr. Pottery!

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I asked god for a bike but i know he doesn't work like that so i stole a bike and asked him for forgiveness

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Why wasn't Johnny at school today? Because he died in childbirth.

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Q: What did bulbasoar say to charmander? A: Bet ya thought I was gunna say Bulbasoar!!

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Why did the little kids call the boy "pornboy" Because he showed gay porn at the bus stop

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what do you get when you mix a llama with a ostrich? i dont know

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What does mickee say to other animals. Mouse

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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