Guy walks into a bar and orders a drink. He goes to the restroom and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. He goes to the restroom again and urinates. He comes back and orders another drink. Guess what happens next? A. He goes to the restroom to urinate B. He buys another drink C. He flirts with a very attractive lady D. Goes home and masturbates

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A white man, a black man, and an Arab man are standing in a room. Who stole your wallet? No one, you suffer from ALS and therefore do not carry a wallet because you have no way in which to use it. To top it all off your medical bills are so high that your family would be financially better if you were to die and your dream of being an entrepreneur is slipping away as you realize that pitching an idea is difficult in a monotonous drone.

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What did Batman say to Robin before they got in the car? "Get in the car."

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What do you call a girl with no legs? Disabled

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A woman was in the kitchen making a sandwich for her husband. Shortly after she brings the sandwich to him and he thanks her seeing as his disabled legs prevent him from walking to the kitchen and making one himself. His wife later heads to her job as a firefighter.

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What's blue and wiggles? A baby in a bag

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What do Michael Jackson and most Catholic priests have in common? They're dead.

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Poop

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what is long black and smelly the welfare line

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What is worst about the great white shark? It's hundreds of sharp teeth, strong tail, or subtle racism? Probably the teeth.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

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What is a name of a kid with down syndrome. Adam Hebeison

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The awkward moment when Delilah got hit by a bus.

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What's like a whale and has a sprained leg? MATT ROSS THE FAT ARSE!!!!

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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Why do many men find it difficult to make eye contact? Debilitating autism.

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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Why didn't the man say, "Hello, Morgan Freeman!" when his friend walked by? Because his friend wasn't Morgan Freeman.

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Two guys walk into a bar. This is really exciting as they haven't seen each other for two years and are looking forward to catching up.

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What did the cat say to the hamster? Meow

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A dyslexic man gets asked what 1+1 is, he replies with a wopping 11. Grats <3

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Why does Michael J. Fox have a good handshake? He has a firm grip

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Wanna hear a joke? Your contact list.

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why did i come to this site i was doing a school easy about the anti-apartheid movement

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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