A black man walks into a bar, and when he left he paid his tab and couldn't have been more courteous.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Who gives a shit? Justin Beiber.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

how did the blonde get a concussion? she didnt see the pole in front of her.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

An Asian walks into a Chinese restaurant. Then he decides that he would prefer Mexican instead, and drives to a Taco Bell.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

10 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Bob Hope, and Jonny Cash. Now we have?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs. Knock Knock? Who's There? Not Suzy. What did Suzy want for Christmas? Parents who loved her. What did Suzy get for Christmas? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Which came first, the chicken or the egg? The Big Bang. -BG_Shank_A

thumb_up thumb_down +1

If life throws you cars, you are probably on LSD.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Knock knock Who's there? No one, you have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what did the boy say when his friend was having a panic attack? "don't panic!" rather earnestly in the hope that his friend's breathing returned to normal as panic attacks can be very uncomfortable and place too great a strain upon the cardio and respiratory functions.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: How did the black man get the white man's money? A: He walked up, politely asked if he could borrow some money, and told him he would pay him back tomorrow.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the mountains? A: Bear food.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What is the similarity between fake rings and your mother? They change colors in the shower

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's sad about a black guy driving up a hill in a car? It's yor car

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what happens when 15 babies cross the street? well, some may be hit by cars. others will have to face the harsh life of reality.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Why the f*** do so many people ask this question?

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well I'll tell you. He was happily gliding down the sidewalk when he realized that his destination was across the road. He then proceeds to take In his surroundings . He finds that there is no indication telling him to stop so he then cautiously walks across the road watching for any dangerous movement. He safely makes it across and proceeds to his destination which is the slaughtering house. He is a retarded chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Your mama's so hairy, the only language she knows is wookie.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

what do you call a mexican baptism? a bean dip

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What did the one man say to the other man? What? I don't know , I wasn't there, that's why I'm asking.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the chicken cross the road? His whole family attempted to cross the road approximately 30 seconds earlier and were immediately struck by a moving vehicle traveling at 45 miles per hour. He crossed the road to try to comfort his family while they took their final breathes of life. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a man that had recently been laid off from his union job and came down with a disease that is considered uncurable by modern science.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A Jew walks into an expensive Hotel and orders 500 dollars worth of wine.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the scientist go to the hospital? because he was experimenting with dangerous chemicals, and they exploded in his unsuspecting face. He doesn't have skin now.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man walks into a bar. The bartender asks what he'd like to drink. The man pulls out his gun, shoots the surprised bartender, and proceeds to execute all the patrons of the bar and finally commit suicide. A post-mortem identification of the man identifies him as a victim of childhood sexual abuse and a diagnosed schizophrenic. There is a nice funeral for all the victims and the media respectfully minimizes exposure of the event.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops