Why did the tissue dance? Because it had a boggie

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar and decide to have a drinking contest. Who won? The rabbi. The priest died of alcohol poisoning later that night.

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How do you confuse Helen Keller? You don't. She's dead.

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man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasn't that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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Knock knock. The door was not answered because, rather than rapping upon the door with his knuckles twice consecutively, Joseph simply said the onomatopoeia verbs vocally. He intended to wish his neighbor and dear friend of twenty years the best of luck with his current situation, as his neighbor had been recently divorced from a marriage of forty-eight years. Joseph then walked home, because intruding upon his friend's privacy would have befuddled him even further.

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What did Jesus say last before being nailed to the cross? I don't know, It never happened. ...Why did he say that? He didn't, it's not real.

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if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

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Where was Sally when the bomb went off? Everywhere...

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What did my wife say when I asked her to pick up some milk on her way home from work? OK

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Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

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How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? One, men will screw anything.

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Why did the gecko cross the road.... Because he saw great deals on car insurance!!!

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Why did the hot blonde strip down? So she can take a shower

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knock knock , who there ray, ray who , ray winstone , I am your daddy you'll get your perks.

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How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

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Your Mom is so poor she can't afford home-owners insurance.

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sdasdadasdasd

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Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

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Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

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Why couldn't the Canadian taste the maple syrup? Because someone cut off his tongue. -BLLJ

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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