if life gives you lemons, you have some lemons

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How many men does it take to screw a light bulb? One, men will screw anything.

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Why did the hot blonde strip down? So she can take a shower

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Whats worse than being a student? Being raped.

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Why did the gecko cross the road.... Because he saw great deals on car insurance!!!

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What did my wife say when I asked her to pick up some milk on her way home from work? OK

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knock knock , who there ray, ray who , ray winstone , I am your daddy you'll get your perks.

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sdasdadasdasd

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How do you get a firetruck to swerve uncontrollably? Shoot the driver with a 12 gauge.

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Does your face hurt? Because if it does, you might want to see a doctor.

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Your Mom is so poor she can't afford home-owners insurance.

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Why did the school bus crash? The driver was a loaf of bread.

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Why couldn't the Canadian taste the maple syrup? Because someone cut off his tongue. -BLLJ

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How do you stop a black kid from bouncing on the bed? Put Velcro on the cealing.

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a man is bussy at work, when he gets called by his doctor. YOUR WIFE IS HAVING A BABY! the doctor yells. so the man runs to his car, drives home like a madman, and arrives home with his doctor holding the newborn in his arms. "congratulations" the doctor says "it's a boy" the man takes the baby in his arms and says: "but, this child is black!" his wife cheated on him and the familly breaks appart

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A man walks into a bakery and buys a doughnut. He then starts to drive home when he realised that he'd forgoten to eat the doughtnut and has to returne to do so.

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What does it take to write a good joke? A punchline

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What's the difference between your cat and mine? Yours has legs.

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In Soviet Russia it is normally colder than america and most people speak russian.

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Your mother is so bad at cooking that people often remark on how bad at cooking she is.

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Yo mamas so fat.

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Is the capitol of Michigan pronounced DEE-troit or de-TROIT? It's pronounced Lansing.

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Why did the fat guy survive the plain crash He didn't he died like everyone else

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What does it smell like, what does it feel like, do you like it? Yes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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