What goes up and does not come down? Why the hell ask me.

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> Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? > Because he had severe autism and was Ambulophobic.

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What did the blind lawyer say to the doctor? We're both lawyers!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Interrupting Doctor Interru- You have cancer.

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What is the difference between a bucket of shit and a Jew? The Bucket.

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you wanna hear a funny joke? so do I

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what is red, black, and blue all over? A horribly painted room.

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what?

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How can you tell if a substance is an acid or a base just by looking at it? You can't. pH or Litmus paper would be necessary in order to determine whether a substance is an acid or a base.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Jupiter is the Galaxys biggest planet!

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What do the poor have that the rich need? Nothing.

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What did the serial killer eat for breakfast? You.

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An early Jewish man walks into a bar where a number of stormtroopers have gathered for drinks and is taken into custody and then delivered by railcar to a camp where he and other persecuted minorities are deliberately imprisoned in a relatively small space with inadequate facilities where they await their mass execution.

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Why did the homeless man get a house key cut? He didn't he's homeless.

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How long did it take azaha to have a shit? Nine months

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Who's there? Alzheimers

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Q. How do you kill 5000 flies? A. Slap a afraican in the face.

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Luck is not real. But the dismembered body in my basement is.

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Why didn't the Irishman want to drink anymore? Because he wasn't thirsty.

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What does a pelican and a taxman have in common? Both are bipedal, both are carbon-based lifeforms that procreate by DNA replication, both in all probablility eat fish, both have survival instinct, both require fresh water for hydration, both have five senses; vision, hearing, touch, taste and smell, both are capable of at least limited cognition, and both can turn aggressive when provoked.

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why do all good things come to an end? that is one of the mysteries of human existance.

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmicist.

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If I had 10 cents for every time a hobo asked for change i still wouldn't give him any money

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Xzibit

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops