Why did Suzue fall of the swing? The chain broke.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

How did the child cross the road? He couldn't his legs had been lost in an awful car accident that had killed his whole family.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the chIcken cross the road? To escape the holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

If someone tells you to look behind you do you? No

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the guy sad? His son killed himself after being constantly bullied for 6 years.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did Old Man Robert fall down the stairs? Someone kicked him down. And then he died.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why did the woman not wear a bra? Because she had breast cancer and got a double mastectomy.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Why was the presidential candidate sad? He mother was raped on her way to hear his speech and his brother hung himself in his apartment two days earlier.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

please ignore the bottom two 'jokes' as they were written by josh carey and ryan danielz

thumb_up thumb_down -17

"Well, you done done me and you bet I felt it; I tried to be chill, but then I realized that when used as an adjective, 'chill' refers to the temperature." -Jason Mraz

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Why did the chicken cross the road? There was an object of great appeal to him on the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Penis

thumb_up thumb_down -19

The awkward moment when you have cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

How do you make a plumber cry? Shit a brick.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A rabbi walks into a bar, in traditional Jewish garb. The bartender takes one look at him and says "Sorry, you'll have to leave". The Jewish gentleman says "Why, don't you serve Jews in here?". The bartender replies "Of course we do, but we just found asbestos in the walls and we're closing for remodeling." The rabbi politely apologizes for making misplaced assumptions about the bartender's place of business.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

A Mexican, A Caucasian and An African American walk into a bar. Suddenly, a rival of the African American's pulls up in a used Chevrolet and shoots him 6 times with a semi-automatic handgun. The Mexican and Caucasian are distraught and call 911 immediately. The rival is later arrested and found guilty of murder in the first degree by a jury of his peers. Less than 6 months later, the bar is closed due to the negative stigma surrounding the shooting. Urban life is a harrowing and tough experience that most outsiders will never fully understand.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No-one because that's not feasible.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What bug has eight legs? Not a spider.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What happened to Johnny when he fell of his bike? He had a seizure, went into a coma, and forced his parents to take him off life support. Happy birthday Johnny.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did James say when he couldn't find his car? "My name's James".

thumb_up thumb_down -19

what do you call an astrounaut in space? an astrounaut you racist bastard

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What's brown and sticky? The british econonic system from 2 May 1997 to 27 June 2007.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What happens when a PC gamer without a mic rages? ASDKFHQIUEWHASKZNF9324Y8PTWFSDIUHASDFADSFUFKASJDF843QADKJVNCXT%$W(ESDHDSFAAASDFASKLDFU8EWADSdsfalsdkjfhuewanzxcAJSKDFUIEW

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops