Jeremy has 8 apples. Susie has 3. how much does Jason have? Purple because aliens don't like grapes.

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well, I'm dying of AIDS, so....

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What did Chuck Norris say to the man that asked for his autograph? He happily obliged and continued on with his day.

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How do you describe a funny man on stilts? Stand up comedy

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What do you call a Muslim flying a plane? A pilot.

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whats worse than your little sster being raped? her being raped by your father.

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yo mama is fat shes fat

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A handless Asian boy was riding his bike through the park with some friends. One of his friends puts his arms in the air and yells "Look! No hands!" The handless boy rides his bike home, crying and thinking about how one day he would like to say, "Look! No hands!" without people getting nauseous.

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i am an inbred jew who likes penis up my bum ~Nathan Barras

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What's the difference between a duck?

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What's brown and sticky? Poo.

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Your mom is so fat that when she went to the Doctors, He said she was slightly over weight

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What did the Pope say to the little boy? Look both ways before crossing the street

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A guy trips a blind man.

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*knock knock* "who's there?" "me, the person who knocked..duh"

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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There was a man who had a camel, but one day he lost his camel. He wanted to go and look for it but he couldnt because he had to go to work. So the next morning he went to look for his camel. He went over the road and saw a gate, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate and saw a forest, but he couldnt through because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest and saw a hill,but he couldnt go down the hill because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill and saw a river,but he couldnt go over the river because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river and saw a house, but he couldnt go to the house because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house and saw a door, but he couldnt knock on the door because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, and saw a man, but he couldnt speak to the man because he had to go to work. The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", but the man couldnt respond because he had to go to work The next morning he went over the road, through the gate, through the forest,over the hill, over the river, to the house, knocked on the door, saw a man, and asked the man, "have you seen my camel?", and the man said, "no"

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If you have 5 dollars, and Chuck Norris has 5 dollars, you are both very poor.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? I. I who? I broke my dick.

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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What happens when you walk by two black men? You walk by two black men.

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Whats the differense between a pile of dead babies and a Farrari I actually have a Farrari in my garage.

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why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels in your presence? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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