Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

What was the Latino man doing on my laptop? He was my friend and he had asked me first. He was also ordering a computer on amazon for himself.

Why did the black kid with one leg read the Iliad? Because it was part of his homework assignment?

Why should you paint a canoe black? Being the darkest color, it will hide dirt, scratches, and normal wear and tear on your canoe better than lighter colors.

What killed the name cool? Coolio

Roses are grey Violets are gray Tulips are grey Lilly's are grey Dandelions are grey Daisy's are grey Daffodils are grey I am colour blind.

whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket in disguise

O.J. Simpson. What would you do in that situation?

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

What do you call a guy with newmonya? Not good at spelling

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor"

What is black and blue and really is not in the mood for sex? The new girl at the women's shelter.

Roxanne's hat looks like a condom

What's funny? At the exact moment you read this, someone is suffering from domestic abuse.

What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? Where's my tractor?

When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

What's worse then having gum stuck on the bottom of your shoe? Having a stick poked in your eye. What's worse then having a stick poked in your eye? Having a nail go through your foot. What's worse then having a nail go through your foot? Having a stick poked in your eye and a nail going through your foot.

What is grey and looks like a rock? A rock

What's the difference between a black man and a bicycle? ( I don't know. ) You're so racist.

Moral"We all miss someone sometimes during our life, but just remain patient as you aim again, reload and hit that someone!"

How many watermelons did the black man have? Too many to count, he was a farmer and his primary crop was watermelons.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? NOT SALLY

Bison: I just dont feel like having bread for breakfast again Sagat: You want some... Cornflakes? Bison: Ohohoh Ahahaha! Sagat: You like it? Bison: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Balrog: :( What about those tapes I made for you? You want me to...:( Bison: Balrog, shut up.

What did Madeline McCann get for Christmas? Nothing she's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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