Why did the chicken cross the road? To go to the slaughter-house.

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matty russel are you on here

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What's worse then finding a finger in your Chili? Getting Mollested by a Pterodactyl.

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how do you get a mexican to fall off of a cliff? you push them off

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The Pope

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The early bird gets the worm, but the angry bird gets the pig.

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kiss me?

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What do you call a snail driving a boat? An accident waiting to happen.

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A black guy walks into his bar. So he pays his tab and couldn't have been more coureious.

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Why did the black guy hit his head while walking through a doorway? Because he was tall.

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Ipod to earbuds: "hey buds" earbuds response: "sup player"

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Did you hear about the man who thought his wife was trying to kill him? He's dead.

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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When life gives you lemons, make grape juice, then watch the world as they wonder how you did it

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A drunken man grabbed a gun and shot his entire family to death. Luckily, a even drunker man had shot them moments before, so it really only served to ruin the perfectly good wall behind them with bullet holes.

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What is white and is sometimes drunk? Milk.

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what did tyrone want for Christmas? A dad.

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your mum

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what do you call a grown man who sticks food up his nose? retarded

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman.

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Whats worse than forgetting some thing at the supermarket? your nuts being nail gunned to the wall.

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What happened when john pelted susie with a rock? she had a temporary concusion, needed eight stitches and John was grounded

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Ebola

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Why did Frank go to the doctor? He had a bad case of the ebeyjeebes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops