Why did the chicken cross the road? because he was hungry and mcdonalds was across the street

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Q. What do you get when a banana and a person mate? A. The banana suffocates

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Guy1:should I ask this girl out? Guy2:NO!!!!!!! Guy1:????????

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Miranda Cosgrove's singing career. ......Thats it. Thats the joke.

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What do you call a middle-aged man at a preschool? A teacher.

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R.I.P. Steve Jobs

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why did the one handed man cross the road? to get to the secondhand shop.

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Dr Dr I think I have diarrhea You have irritable bowel syndrome, I recommend IBS support

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What do you do when jews take over your country? Invade Poland.

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What do you do when a man in a corner offers you candy? You walk away.

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+stupid&start=148&hl=en&safe=active&sa=X&biw=1022&bih=539&tbm=isch&prmd=imvnso&tbnid=L4yN-90F2S2nXM:&imgrefurl=http://www.britishbeautyblogger.com/2012/05/justin-bieber-nails.html&docid=yYdBShdYVODKdM&imgurl=http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-YFyj_mKUypY/T6VP6iGQeCI/AAAAAAAAJjI/y6cpVYjn9Gs/s1600/harry.PNG&w=573&h=413&ei=ZY7HT_XqHo2c8QStiY2IDw&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=724&vpy=140&dur=435&hovh=191&hovw=265&tx=75&ty=135&sig=110416686013590693091&page=12&tbnh=148&tbnw=229&ndsp=13&ved=1t:429,r:7,s:148,i:142

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If a tree falls, and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? No. While the falling tree surely creates mechanical oscillations in the air, sound is defined as the mechanical oscillations in the air perceived by humans. Therefore, since no humans were around to hear the tree fall, it did not create a sound.

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How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Well that, my friend, is a good question.

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket whats blue and looks like a bucket? a red bucket in disguise

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A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

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How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

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whats big green and fuzzy and would kill you if it fell out of a tree? a pool table

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The Tiarajudens is a Permian land-walrus.

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What's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? Chuck Noris

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How did the chicken cross the road? Suicide. There was a graveyard across the street. RIP Mr. Chicken.

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What's the difference between a duck? One of it's feet are both yellow.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It wanted to see its chicks that got run over by a car.

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names

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captcha: all yer base

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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