Q: What did Cyclops say to Wolverine? A: "We're both X-Men!"

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do black people eat for breakfast? Cereal.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

There was a girl who was allergic to peanuts she ate peanuts and died the next day. She got hit by a bus.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How many hearts does a jellyfish have? None.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the mentally challenged man enter the bar? He's tired of being subject hate and criticism. He hates being the subject of jokes and being pointed at. He may not be able to tell you what 3x6 is, but he still has feelings. So because of all these inconsiderate people judging him, he now spends his days at the local bar, drowning his sorrows away in alcohol. I hope your happy.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the black man rob the store? Because he was hard on money for a reason not associated with race or stereotypes whatsoever.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a guy who has no experience flying a plane? Suicidal

thumb_up thumb_down +1

hardy har har.. i should be working on a school project right now!!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Man: Are you tired Woman: No why? Man: You have bags under your eyes and you just yawned a minute ago

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Yo mama's so fat, that when she jumped, gravity pushed her back to the floor!

thumb_up thumb_down +1

whats funny? a relatsion ship for 16 hours

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why did the Jew wear a beanie while playing soccer? Because he shaved his head

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Abstract thinking part one of... One: What kind of idiot tries to run trough a wall, rather than to just use the door? The "Idiot" is in a cell whose walls are made of thin wood plates, the door is made of steel and locked. How I cured my own damn anxiety five hundred of one: Now this is real see? I got stressed, damn it was like something that was not me but my body scared as shit began fearing for its life right my arms shaking like fuck sweat and all that crapa? So I got pissed got in front of the mirror, stared at myself and shouted "GODDAMN BODY YOU THINKS YOU CAN CONTROL ME? IF YOU DO NOT STOP BEING SO FUCKING AFRAID OF DEATH! THEN I WILL KILL YOU MYSELF!" So yeah unconventional indeed, but it worked for five times, and I never had to use it anymore. Moral: My own body and every fucking cell of it, is not the only one that fears me more than death.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Im going to the patriots jets game this year..... When the kick a feild goal and you see two kids wearing lime green holding up a poster that says BRADY LIKES SAGGY BALLS that will be me and my friend -RT

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do 9 out of 10 people like? Gang rape.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What's stronger than then the love of a mother and her child? A semi-truck

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I have read and agree to the Terms of Service.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What causes floods? Too much water.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A blind guy walks into a bar because he can't see.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

who's sexually attracted to bones? James Cornish

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A little girl had a sleepover with her friends. They watched a movie, then went to bed at a reasonable time. /

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Why was the women out of the kitchen? She felt the desire to relax after a day of work...

thumb_up thumb_down +1

What do you call a tennis match between Helen Keller and Stevie Wonder? An anachronistic hypothetical sporting event that would never happen.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

I see said the blind man to his def wife as the dog with no legs ran over

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops