"What do you call a man who has bumblebee wings and fire for blood?" (The doctor on the other line has no answer. Tom desperately weeps into the phone, trying to grasp his sudden transformation. He finds no reassurance, and hangs up the phone.)

Three males walked into a bar. one of them was a kangaroo.

Knock Knock Who's there? A human pretending to be a dog A human pretending to be a dog who? Errr...I mean...woof

Why did the fat lady poop on my knee? Because i'm thirsty.

An Irish man walked into a bar. He turned to the bartender and said hello. Then walked to the back booth for his lunch meeting with the heads of his highly profitable company and then went home.

What's the difference between a woman with an IQ of 160, and a man who is mentally challenged? Although being a much easier potential victim, no one has raped the mentally challenged man.. yet.

Q: How do you make a cat bark? A: Douse it in gasoline and throw it in a fire.........WOOF!!!!

What did one Black man say to the other Black man before they ate? I hope you're hungry!

Need an ark to save two of every animal? I noah guy.

Your mom is so fat that she has to wear large clothing.

Yo mom is so fat and stupid that she used butter to get through the doorway, but she ate it

Roses are red. Violets are blue. What do flowers have to do with this joke I want to tell you?

You're*

Why did the kid fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms. Why couldn't he get up? Because he had no legs. Knock, Knock Who's there? Not that kid.

what's brown and sticky? A stick!

Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at rhyming Refrigerator.

Knock knock (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) (Knock knock...) Fuck me, that's the most echo-y door I've ever knocked on.

An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have a pleasant evening as they talk to each other about their day over a relaxing drink.

Why did the woman make so many sandwiches? Because she was a mother catering her child's sporting event.

why did the chicken cross the road??? I don't know, that's why I asked you -_-

What is purple and green at the same time? Grapes, I lied about at the same time.

"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "God" "Then come right in!"

What did the famed say when he lost his tractor I lost my tractor!!!!

How many people does it take to drive a car? 1 person

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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