What do Michael Jackson and your family have in common? They're both dead.

What's the difference between a teacher and a train? A lot.

A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

How do you kill an american? You shoot them

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

Why did the world not end in 2012? Because the Mayans were drunks.

Why was the guy sad? His son killed himself after being constantly bullied for 6 years.

What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? F*ck

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, Obama is a good president, I beg to differ.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. These are facts. Good day.

Do you know the difference between a Mexican and a bench? One is a human, and one is an inanimate object.

Dyslexic devil worshippers sell their souls to Santa

What's the difference between an orange and a dead baby? One is a popular citrus fruit commonly grown in Florida, and the other is a horrible tragedy, possibly caused by miscarriage or a serial killer, who was hopefully immediately jailed for his actions.

When is your birthday? November 13 what year? every year

A black guy walks into a bar... *3 hours later* He walks out...

What's funny about 9/11? Nothing.

Why did the kid tell yo mama jokes to insult other kids? His mom had just committed suicide due to depression caused by the kid's bad habits.

That's why her hair is so big, she teases it and uses a lot of expensive products.

Why do black people like fried chicken? -Because all races like fried chicken.

What did the dog say to the mailman? nothing, dogs lack the mental capacity for human speech therefore he was unable to communicate his message verbally

What do you call a black guy that drives a plane? A pilot

Congress back then: No sooner had I ended this prayer than a pederast farted on my right. "Hah! a good omen," said I, and prostrated myself; then I burst open the door by a vigorous push with my arse, and, opening my mouth to the utmost, shouted, "Senators, I wanted you to be the first to hear the good news; since the war broke out, I have never seen anchovies at a lower price!"

whats worse than hitler? Anti-Jokes By darragh hamilton

The anti joke that repeats itself :(

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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