A: how do u wake up lady gaga? B: you poke her face

I AM SO FAT I WANT TO EAT MORE FOOD. I NEED A DOCTOR BECAUSE IM GOING TO END UP LIKE YOUR MOM!

Wanna hear a joke? Denver Broncos.

Here is a joke for you: minecraft -blarg

wood cant chuck wood

"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

How do dinosaurs pay their bills? They don’t, dinosaurs don’t have a capital system.

My sister had a lemonade stand once. And one time, she spilled.

Dory from Finding Nemo: "Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy- Hey, I just met you."

What's the difference between 6 and 7? 1.

Q: What did Gaddafi get for Christmas? A: Brain Surgery

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock... Who's there? Not Suzy.

What did one paper bill say to the other? Did you hear about one of us getting replaced by a woman? It's like Bruce to Caitlyn!

Uh, if I say that I am that girl, am I going to be safe?

whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

Knock Knock! The man inside chooses not to answer the door and the caller walks away.

O.J. Simpson. What would you do in that situation?

Q:theres a man on a tight rope 3000 feet above ground and theres a man getting head from a 90 year old women with no teath. what did they both say? A: dont look down.

A baby elephant steps on a lego. First thought, auch, huh ?! Actually, the lego was fine with it and so was the baby elephant. Now they're married and are expecting a baby legophant.

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7? A: Because 7 is a serial killer.

What's harder than nailing a baby to a tree? My penis whilst im doing it.

hipsters

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face", the horse said nothing; because it is a horse.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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