What do a Jew and a Vegan have in common? They both won't eat pork products.

Antijoke the book. Seriously it sucks ass, do not bother, they only included the very worst ones.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he clearly has an owner that doesn't fence him in.

What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

what did the chicken cross the road? because its a chicken

do you know what happened to the bravest warrior in the battle who got stabbed in the foot while trying to rescue puppies from a burning building and dying children? well he took the children and puppies home, and ate them. then the SWAT came in and killed him. so yeah... oh... suck my a s s barf

whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

Knock knock Who's there? Your friend Jim Oh hello Jim, please come in it is very nice to see you this fine evening.

What's worse than the holocaust. I'm a Nazi so the holocaust wasn't actually that bad.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1

How many black people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? There are many circumstances that could affect the outcome of the situation. One of them is whether or not the given people have or will soon obtain a ladder. In this case, the lightbulb could take more time than needed to be screwed in and effectively changed. Another key factor in the situation is the number of people. If there are enough people to reach the ceiling without a ladder, the lightbulb could be screwed in sooner or later than asked by the owner of the facility in which the lightbulb socket is installed. Finally, the height of the persons given is a crucial point in this situation. The people may be tall, thus allowing there to be fewer people needed. The people could be short and need a greater number of people than if the people were, perhaps, a bit taller. All in all, I'd say about 1-2.

Why was the black man scared of the chainsaw? Because his father was killed by one when he landed on it when he fell of his ladder that was holding him up while he was cutting the limbs of a tree.

That's why her hair is so big, she teases it and uses a lot of expensive products.

how many gay guys does it take to fix a blender? baby oil!

You wanna hear a JOKE ?!! Justin Bieber has a DlCK !!!

Tell me a joke Tell me a joke! TELL ME A JOKE!!! ...Womens Rights

What's worse than a murderer? Two murderers.

What do Tiger Woods and Charlie Sheen have in common? They are both celebrities.

What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

what did the little boy say to little girl? I shit bricks.

Why did the woman not make her husband a sandwich? Because he died in 9/11

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Certainly not Sally

what does a gorilla do when it sleeps. it snores.

Why does Owen Wilson have an ugly nose? Because of his refusal to get plastic surgery.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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