Why did the little boy cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken

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How do you scare a blonde? Put the barrel of a gun to the side of her head.

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How do you get a clown to stop smiling? Hit him with an ax

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wanna hear a joke? asians with t i t s

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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I was the bigger man in the argument. The person I was arguing with is now unconscious.

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Whats black and hangs from the my tree? A tire swing.

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When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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what do you call a deer with no eyes? a deer...

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A black guy is lying on the floor dead with a knife next to him, what killed him? Multiple bullets sprayed from an uzi being held by a rival gang member....

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Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

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Henry: Say the word "really". Moe: Really. Henry: Now say the word "really" with sarcasm. Moe: Really? Henry: More sarcasm! I want you to be very sarcastic! Moe: Oh really??? Henry: There ya go!

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Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? You eat a pizza.

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Hey my names cliff. You should drop by sometime

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Q: What did one car say to another? A: Nothing. Cars can't speak.

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Why is there world hunger? Because you touch yourself at night.

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there are 2 sausages in a pan. one sausage says "wow it's hot in here" and the other sausage says "MY GOD A TALKING SAUSAGE!!!!"

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How do you confuse a blonde? Speak to her in a nonsensical language of gibberish you have devised without her being able to understand or translate.

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hey bill!

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what time is it? 3:16

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What did lady gaga call her grandpa? papaw razi. even wrote a song about him.

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What did the man say to his doctor? AHHH AHHHHH OH MY GOD! AHHH OUCH HOLY SHIT FUUUUUUCK!!!... ____/\_____/\_____/\___________________

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There once was a man from Nantucket who had an affinity for wicker furniture.

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What has 8 legs , 6 eyes and 3 mouths ? - A cowboy riding a horse while holding a chicken .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops