What's worse than a tornado that kills your whole whole family? Nothing.

Why does Eli Manning play for the Giants? Because he is huge.

How do you kill Chuck Norris? Short Answer: You can't.

Nickelback ranked number 1 as greatest rock band according to rolling stones magazine!

A Priest, a Rabbi, and an Orca Whale walk into a local eatery to discuss what is on their mind. The Priest says he is proud that even though their community is comprised of people residing in many different religions, they still work together to strive for a better tomorrow. The Rabbi nods his head in agreement,he states that he is proud of all the hard working men in their community that are willing to make sacrifices for the needy. The Orca Whale also nods in agreement and pauses for a moment to think while he insight-fully gleams at his two other friends. The Mighty Orca Whale then contributes to the conversation by saying eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuurrrr!

What did the firefighter say to his crew when they put out the fire? -Let's go home

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Who can make 50 iPads in 1 hour? An Asian

Knock knock. "Who's there?" I am deaf. "I am deaf who?" What?

Jews... The only funny thing they did was piss off Adolf Hitler

Roses are red, violets are blue ive got a gun so get in the van!

I like my women how I like my salad. Without a penis.

how now brown cow. WTF.

Roses are red, violets are blue. I have a gun, get in the van

Why did the boy rip out all of his hair? He was insane.

How many times have I told you not to do that? Fourteen.

Why didn't the baby cry? It was stillborn.

What is less sanitary than eating food off of the ground? Anal sex.

Why couldn't Helen Keller see or hear? She was blind and deaf.

"What would you do if i gave you a million dollars?" "I would scream and jump up and down? Are you really gonna give me a million dollars?" "No i just wanted to see what you would have said, that's all"

Q

What do you call Americas first black president? A change.

what did the farmer say to the cowgirl that made her positive that she had a weird laugh? you have a weird laugh.

Al Kida and Terry Wrist walk out of jail.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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