(-(-(-(--)-)-)-) Look the chinese mafia

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How do you make a baby float? 1 can root bear 2 scoop baby

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Knock Knock! Come in.

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? Because the burglars tied her up and gagged her before they robbed the house and she couldn't do anything until one of the neighbors found her and untied her.

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Why is 6 afriad of 7? because 7 killed 8 with a pistol and is now on a killing spree.

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Roses are red Violets are blue So is your face Cuz I just gagged you

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what do outgoing girls get on spring break? raped.

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

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Why did the man throw the woman off the cliffe? Tequilla.

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An old lady walks into a bar. She was the janitor.

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A Man: Why does it seem as though you always find what you need in the last place you look? Another Man: Probably because you don't continue to look.

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Yo mamas so fat

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Q: what do you call a bunch of dead accountants? A: the holacost.

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There was a black man a Spanish man and an Asian in the back of a police car. The end

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What did the German say the the Jewish man? "Hello, nice to meet you."

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

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Billy comes home from playing with his friend as he walks to his front yard he comes across his mother...she is dead on the floor his friend then says "im SO sorry your mom is dead but at least you still have your dad" Billy than replies "my mom is my dad" billy then is put into a foster home and spends years trying to recover from the fact that he is the freak offspring of a hermaphrodite

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What's black and white, and red all over ? A penguin in a blender.

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Where does Osama bin Laden do his shopping? He doesn't, he's dead.

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Come In!

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Q. What's worse than 400 babies going down the road at 80 miles per hours in a garbage truck? A. The same babies being dumped into a trash compactor

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Why did the baby cry? Because his parents dropped him on his head.

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What's ur favorite color? Cancer Made by mark

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How many dead kittens can you fit into a trunk? -19

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops