What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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A black baby dies and goes to Heaven. When god put wings on him the baby sais, "Ahh gee god am I an angel?" Then god sais, "Nahh nigga you a bat."

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What do get when you cross a lion and tiger? A liger. This hybrid mammal, only observed in captivity, is the largest of all known felines and is thought to be sterile.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christimas? A: Cancer.

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How do you make a blonde happy? Do something that causes that person to release endorphins.

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Why did the cookie go to the doctor's office? He had brain cancer.

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POO IS LARGE WHEN IT COMES OUT OF ME

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Roses are red, foxes are clever, I like your butt, let me touch it forever!

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what did the little boy say to little girl? I shit bricks.

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"What happened to John after he got drunk 12 years ago"- police "I don't really don't know that question"- John Jr.

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what did the blind kid want for christmas? world peace.

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If u wanna get high, smoke weed

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I like hats XD!

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what did the white guy say to the mexican? mow my lawn asshole

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Two buissness men had a meeting at 12:00 they had there meeting at 12:00 and left back to there normal life.

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pretend its saturday.... what is the square root of 9? who cares? everyone knows that you don't do math on saturday.

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Did you hear about the blind carpenter who picked up his hammer and saw? Did you hear about the deaf shepherd who gathered his flock and heard (herd)? If you don't understand these, use your dictionary and look up the words "blind," "deaf," "saw," "heard" and "herd." http://gpsphone-tracker.com/

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Why did the gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chickens foot.

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3 penguins meet each other in penguin #1's backyard for a pool party. The first penguin climbs up the steps of the water slide gets to the top, looks around and then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The second penguin climbs up the steps, looks around then slides down the slide *SPLASH* The third penguin hastily climbs the steps and slides down the slide radio -Soulbroker

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What do you call someone who takes a toaster into their bath? Adele's number one fan.

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Three men walk into a bar. Neither of them saw it coming

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What does Batman say to scare Robin? Don't make me get the bat!

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boobies oh boobies i how i love u boobies the are so juicy with milk and hairy with in the tities

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Knock Knock Who's there? ImBrewn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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