Why wasn't Fred invited to he party? Because he's been dead for five years

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How many dead babies fit into a bathtub? I honestly don't know, as I have never tested this out, nor do I plan to because I would like to not handle the bodies of poor deceased infants.

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The awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it dinosaur.

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There were two oranges in a bowl. One orange said to the other "Hello my orange friend". The other orange screamed because he did not know oranges could talk.

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How do you kill a 6'5 black man in a dark alley? Stab him 3 times in the appendix with a 12 inch blade.

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Q: Why did the koala fall out of the tree? A: Because it was dead

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Q: How many jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: 6 million and 1

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Why did Miss Parkinson get hit by a bus? Because it missed Justin Bieber by a few inches.

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Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: Knock Knock Person 2: Who's there? Person 1: A deaf guy

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buttcrack thumbs up

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Why did he die? He was sick.

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yfygcugyuyc

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What is worse than falling down the stairs? Having leukemia.

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Why did sally fall off the swing? She had no arms Why couldn't she get back up? She blew up

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There was a man from the hood, His limericks weren't very good, So he decided to become a purveyor of monogrammed handkerchiefs and other fine linen products.

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Person A - I farted Person B - YUCK

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how do make you a child cry? break his fingers

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Why don't men ask for directions? They want to appear knowledgeable and strong. Asking for directions is sometimes considered a sign of weakness.

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How many chicken feathers are there in a 50 pound bag? 50 pounds worth Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a duck Why did the man cross the road? It was duck season A woman is dying but can't reach her husband. Why? A duck ate his cell-phone A pig walks into a bar but there is no bartender. Where is she? Dead A duck hunter is selling a duck to a man. The man only pays the duck hunter a quarter. Why? It was full of chicken feathers.

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What did the orange elephant with 6 legs say? Kill me.

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Never tell Alzheimer's jokes to old people. They will not remember them.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms

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A duck walks by to a lemonade stand. He says to the man running the stand, "Quack."

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what happened after 9/11?? 9/12.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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