An old lady walks into a bar. She was the janitor.

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A guy walks into a bar. He was an alcoholic and it was destroying his family.

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What did God say to the snake when the Snake decided to ignore God and just give Eve the apples? Snake what are you doing? Answer me, SNAKE! SNAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE! *DUN DUN DURUDUN! DU DU DUN! *gunshot* Moral: I just hate thumbs ups, and the comments where I omit this receives those horrible green thumbs instead of them sexy red ones, so there goes.

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Three males walked into a bar. one of them was a kangaroo.

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I helped build the town school. But when people see me, no one says "Hey, there's the guy that built the town school." I helped put out the flames, when the city was on fire. But when people see me they don't say "Hey, there's the hero that saved the city." But I have sex with one goat.... And people judge me justifiably asd having sex with goats is really disgusting and sticks in peoples minds.

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three men get stranded on a island and cannibals find them and they say go find 3 fruits and come back. first guy comes back with three apples and they say we will shuve them in your rectum and if you scream we will kill you he screams he dies. second guy comes back with grapes and he laughs before they can start. and in heaven the first guy says why did you laugh and he says there voices are funny.

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Q.what does the kid scream when he see's a creepy man in a big van pull up? A. ICE CREAM!

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Lots of things. Life isn't all about you, you know.

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hi corey

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A Irishman walks into a bar... he suffers severe head injuries.

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What a russian says to another russian? I don't know, but it must be somthing in russian.

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What the difference between water and water? Nothing, they're both water.

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IT WAS NEVER YOURS TO TAKE!

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What did the robber take from the store? The managers dick

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What did the blind guy say when he walked past a fish store? Something smells fishy

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what do you call a cow with no legs? ground BEEF!!!!

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Why was the women's basketball player laughed at. The slippery floor caused her to stumble and fall.

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One time Chuck Norris cried. He felt slightly better after the experience, but, unfortunately, his grandmother still died of cancer.

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I ate a pancake for breakfast not

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What percentage of her brain does Sarah Palin use? 100%. That humans use only 10 or 30% of their brains is a myth.

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Why did suzy drop her popsicle? She was trampled by a homosexual moose.

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What do you call a kid with cancer? screwed

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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I have a black guy in my family tree? Yea, his still hanging their

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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