How do you wake up Lady Gaga? "Poker Face"

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Whats worse that a rhino hitting you in the face? A rhino with horns hitting you in the face

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Q: Who are the fastest readers? A: 9/11 jumpers 200 stories in 5 seconds

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Why did Sam have no friends? Because he was dead.

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Cold camel scrotum.

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Guess What? What? Get in the van.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to th party? Because he was dead.

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tried to think of a great "anti-joke" not creative enough

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Q: What did the chinese man say to the other Chinese man? A: I don't know, I don't sneak Chinese

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A 14 year old walks into a bar. The bartender yells "Hey, no minors allowed here!" A 14 year old walks out of a bar.

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Hey

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A blonde walks into a bar She said, agh that hurt

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What do you call a black man riding a bike? Alan. He's studying environmental engineering at NYU.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did Simon drown? Simon couldn't swim.

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I've got a shotgun with two bullets. I've got two enemies. What do I do with the gun? Go bird hunting.

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Waseem is not a funny guy!

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What is the best thing about chuck norris? hes holding a gun to my hea

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Do you want to hear a joke? To bad! :)

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Why did jack fall down the hill ? Because Jill pushed him.

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What do you call a black man? Jamal

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Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had escaped from a KFC slaughterhouse, and proceeded forward to avoid getting caught. However, the chicken did not consider the childhood lectures off his parents about crossing the road safely, and got ran over by a black Golf GTI, and died instantly.

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What did the man say when he was hit with a flying watermelon? Ouch.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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