Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

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what does a pickle and a computer have in common? ... they both have a mouse.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Very carefully.

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A woman is home washing her dishes when she suddenly slips banging her head on a cabinet. She passed out for a few seconds, then woke to find a great gash on her left cheek, fairly spurting blood. At the emergency room, the doctor asks, "How did this happen?" The woman replied, "My boy friend tried to drown me."

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Want to hear a joke about my penis? Nevermind it's too long.

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What do you get when you cross a Mexican, a black guy and an octopus? I don't know but I don't like it.

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Knock, knock (No one was home)

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united we sit, cause we're fat

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boy1: whats blue and goes blub blub? boy2:i dont know boy1:a blue blub blub boy1: whats green and goes blub blub? boy2:a green blub blub boy1:no. there is no such thing called a green blub blub

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What do you get when you combine Seth Rogen and Harrison Ford? A very risky and expensive medical experiment.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens do not possess the mental capacity to grasp the idea of "roads"

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I like my women like I like my coffee, without a dick

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want to hear a joke? so a guy comes into a bar, wait no it was a horse so a guy comes into a horse,,,

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Hitler: I said PASS THE JUICE! not GAS THE JEWS!

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Why does a trash can smell bad? Because there's trash in it.

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Why did the rabbit like to wear shoes? It doesn't.

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whats worse than having your bike stolen? Getting raped

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A white man walked in da hood aaand he never came back

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Q: Why didnt the irishman walk out of the bar? A: He died of severe alchoholism and had a heart attack and died istantly

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side... But he got hit by a car instead, Life is full of disappointments

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a bus.

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Have you ever noticed that when geese fly in a V, one side is long than the other? Do you know why that is? There are more geese on that side

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Women's Sports

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops