Knock knock. Who's there? Open the fucking door. Open it! This is a fucking robbery. This is not a fucking joke. Get down on the ground. Shut that baby up. Shut that fucking baby up! Now! Get on the fucking ground or I swear to Christ I will fucking end your life. Tell the kids to go to their room. Do it. Do it, you fucking bitch! Where's the fucking jewelry? You got any money stashed anywhere? Come on, I know it's here. Keys? Your husband got any guns? Give me everything valuable or I swear to god, I will fucking murder you in front of your son. The woman was brutally raped for hours.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

Your mother called last night. She wants her recipe back.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

why did the chicken cross the road? it was in my sandwich and i'm late for class.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

If a tree falls in the forest does anybody really care?

thumb_up thumb_down +11

JEWS

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why is a squirrel called a squirrel? that's its name.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q: What did the latino kid get for christmas? A; Nothing because he died two days before

thumb_up thumb_down +11

So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did my penis cross the road? To get to the other vagina.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

whats worst than the holocaust? the holocaust times 2

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's longer then Hitlers gas bill Chris Browns Penis

thumb_up thumb_down +11

general tso's broccoli

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The man with a long history of Alzheimer's once said: Roses are red, Violets are blue, Cheese n' toast

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What happen to the guy who didn't breathe A. He died

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Q.What do you call a apple with a unibrow? A. A failed science experiment!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

how did helen keller break her arm? reading at 100 miles per hour

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yolo: Your Oppurtunity Lies Upon...... oh, wait upon starts with a u... YOLU

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A horse walked into a bar. Animal control was immediately called and the horse was returned to it's original owner.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

What did Hellen Keller call her dog? Kamikaze-go, because he was an Akita from Japan and that was his name.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

"Knock Knock!" "Who's Their?" "Mew" "Mew Who?" "Mew Two Stupid! Get yo Pokemon FACTS Right!" "Mew Two Proceeds to walk away in distress"

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Buy one packet of condoms for the price of two packets of condoms, and you will be given a second packet of condoms ABSOLUTLEY FREE!

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob Who? Bob the human.........

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops