A man walks into a bar, unfortunately his brain condition killed him after the swelling in his brain reached a point where his family had to unplug him from a machine putting him in a medically induced coma.

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Do you know why children in Africa don't read Harry Potter too much? Because they can't read.

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What do you call a car with no wheels or engine? Immobile

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What do A Canary and a Groundhog have in common? Nothing, Groundhogs can fly, and Canaries can't dig.

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Why didn't the firefighter put out the fire? Because he wasn't a very good firefighter.

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A Priest in a Rabbi walk into a bar. They talk about religion.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" The horse says, "I have cancer."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Sausage is brown, and so is my wife.

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What did the umpire yell to the flatulent player at bat? FOUL BOWEL!

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What did the duck say when it walked into the house? This isn't where I live.

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how many moms can you fit in a bathtub? as many as you want

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How do you make a bllind person cry? Slowly cut off their toes.

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What did the elephant say to the goldfish? Nothing. Animals are unable to speak and fish aren't able to live on land

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how do you know your at a gay picnic. the hotdogs smell like shit.

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Your mum so fat, she died of a heart attack

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What do you call the alarm system in a failing inner-city school? A dumbbell!

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What do you call Santa's helpers? Chinese factory workers, who live in impoverished conditions, work up to 16 hours a day, earning slave wages. God damn you, Steve Jobs and Mattel.

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what do lions and potatoes have in common? They each drive a sports car, wait neither the lion nor the potato drive a sports car. Sorry to waste your time with this joke that seemed to not really have a meaning or a clever punchline.

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Why did the cop not arrest the driver? The Driver shot him 2 minutes earlier.

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What happened when the joke was bad? crippled up like cancer of the eye

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why did the black man buy a gun? he was a hunter.

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A man and a woman are alone, the man holds her down and says I'm going to rape you! The woman replies I'm not into that and leaves unharmed

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IF UR READING THIS EXPECTING A GOOD JOKE HERE GOES.... WHY DID THE CUP SAY HELLO GET IT ? I DONT

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whats harder than watching a dog get hit by a bus? my boner..

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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