OMG this totally works! Step 1: Hold your breath Step 2: Die

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Why did the basketball player shoot the ball? Because it was being mean to him

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roses are red, violets are blue, charcoal is black, and my neighbor is too.

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Dont be mean Dyslexics are teople poo

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A jew go out of a bar

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If someone throws a fridge at the boy then they must be exceptionally strong because fridges weigh more than the average human can lift therefor he has a good future ahead of him but will have to live with the fact that he hurt a small child

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How do you make a plumber cry? You kill his family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it lacks the cognitive reasoning ability necessary to determine that walking into oncoming traffic will surely result in death

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i died. new product by steve jobs. also presenting icoffin, and next year icoffin 2. slightly slimmer with a lock button to keep zombies out.

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You are short with no perm, you will never be Kat Willams.

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How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

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A jew, a catholic and an atheist are in the desert. They see a dusty lamp. They take it and rub it. Once the lamp is clean, they put it back on the sand and kep walking.

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scenario: 12 men in bikinis throwing snowballs at each other in Africa. Question: Who ate all the world's giant pears? Answer: It was an allergy to noses!!

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Communism, Capitalism and an Irish man walk into a bar. Communism says, “I’ll buy the drinks but I require your complete obedient consent.” Capitalism says, “No I’ll buy the drinks but I require that you pay me back with interest” and the Irish man says “No I… I don’t feel very well at all… Oh shite I’ve got the bloody runs!” He then proceeds to shit myself.

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why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a ferrari? One is a sports car and the other is a baby that is not alive.

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What did the girl say to the guy raping her? Stop.

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What's the most annoying thing in the world? Yourself. (Your friends are saying it too, behind your back)

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Why did Jimmy fail his math test? Because he had a mental disability

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It was taken to a factory where it was butchered, processed and eventually fed to America.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Sam, your doorbell isn't working.

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(Pretend that your adopted, and no one loves you) Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents.

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A Psychologist said that I am a pessimist... Figures.

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-Knock knock -Go away -*Breaks door and shoots*

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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